Overlooked and Scrutinized Simultaneously

Kamrin Hooks
Oct 23
5 min read

Updated: Oct 24

Set the Scene

So far, some of my experiences serving in the Peace Corps as an African American woman in Lesotho.

Basotho (many Lesotho people), Mosotho (one Lesotho person), Sesotho (language), Lesotho (kingdom).

I would like to preface this addition with the disclaimer that, while I speak in general terms, many Basotho people have been amazing and very kind to me. Many have treated me with more respect and love than I know how to process.

Double Whammy

It seems that I am a walking double whammy for any internalized or blatant prejudice, racism, or misogyny, being a woman and an African American.

Recently, I had a fellow volunteer ask me whether I found more negativity stemming from being a woman or an African American in Lesotho. This conversation was preceded by behavior he had previously witnessed that left him shocked. He asked me if I had been experiencing things like this throughout my service so far, and I answered more or less.

My answer to his question then and now is simple. Both. Being a woman automatically puts you at a disadvantage where respect is lacking, and then when they find out I am not Mosotho? Yikes. I like to see it as a learning opportunity to educate people and to be educated. My communication skills are compounding daily.

Mistaken Identity

I am sometimes mistaken for being Mosotho before I open my mouth, and Sesotho with an American accent flows out.

This has its pros and cons, I will admit.

For example, while walking home, I was grabbed by a young man who screamed (in Sesotho), ”I love you, I will marry you.” One of my friends in the village stepped in and helped me. My host family found the guy, and his excuse was that he didn't know I was a Peace Corps Volunteer, or he wouldn't have grabbed me. cue major side eye. Let us all just keep our hands to ourselves, like I tell my kids in class.

Ultimately, the Peace Corps, the Area Chief, and the police met with the village and made it very clear to them. “No touchy, peace corps.” And now, many villagers are personally invested in my safety and tell me to go home if it’s past 5 pm hahaha!

People expect me to pick up Sesotho quickly because of my skin color. I’ve been mocked occasionally for not learning Sesotho fast enough because, in the words of the lovely Mosotho man, “imagine being black in Africa and only speaking English.” jaw drop.

Community Walk

A brighter side to some of these interactions is that I do have people in the country who have stepped in and intervened. A situation comes to mind where, during a community walk designed to foster integration into the village, a volunteer stepped in to defend me when a villager refused to acknowledge me.

We were all standing in a line, around seven of us, six white and one black. The lady went down the line, asking questions, looked at me, said "No," and continued asking questions down the line—jaw dropped. The excuse was that she might not have known I was one of the American volunteers. Still, as soon as the volunteer demanded that she acknowledge me and I greeted her, she stood like a statue, gave no acknowledgement, and turned back to the person she had initially tried to speak to.

World View

The world's perspective is that Americans are only of European descent, and some idolize that image. My cohort went on a hike, and a village lady stopped us (ignored the black women present), turned to the group, and said in Sesotho that she loved them and that they were so beautiful and lucky to be born white. On the opposite end, I have met so many people who are proud to be Basotho and proud to be African.

Okay, test time…

I will give you as long as it takes you to read this sentence to come up with one word you think people around the world may know about African Americans… times up—the n word hard -er.

Omg, I can’t believe you just said it in your head.

Out of the multitude of things that African Americans are known for, i.e., Barack Obama, Beyoncé, W.E.B. Du Bois, Michael Jackson, Allyson Felix!! The hard -er part semi-surprised me, plus the explicit explanation that this term was only used for African Americans with all intents and purposes?

Chips, my little heart.

Funny story, actually: one family tried to coerce one of the European American volunteers into saying the word.

This volunteer used the situation as a learning opportunity for the family and attempted to explain why the use of the word was inappropriate for them or anyone who isn’t African American to use.

Unfortunately, I cannot say that any common ground was made. Great effort though.

Scrutinized

I was walking with a volunteer from the church mentioned previously. He asked me if there was anything he could do to use his benefits of being a white male in Africa to help me.

Pretty deep question.

I was distracted, and we happened to walk past a group of five Basotho, two of whom are host mothers to other volunteers (meaning that they knew we were both volunteers), who reprimanded me for not greeting my elders.

Keep in mind, my counterpart had not spoken to them, and neither had my two host sisters. Mostly overlooked, but my actions are scrutinized.

Looking Back

I look around and see people who look like me, with some similar cultural practices, habits, and ideas, but who don’t always see me as an equal in deference to them or my white counterparts.

The staff have been helpful in these situations. Proactive and reactive measures are taken to ensure our safety as volunteers in the community and within the Peace Corps.

They even briefed families and staff members in the country on how Americans look different, how skin color does not determine learning speed, and many other topics.

More Good than Bad

These moments don't define my experience; they deepen it. It's messy and meaningful all at the same time.

No regrets —I can feel my neurons forming new pathways as my time here continues.

SO, call to action for all people! Apply to the Peace Corps!

I know I haven’t been convincing, and I have no way to justify why you should apply. but like, still do it? I have a lot of service left, and I can feel how rewarding this experience will be for me. It’s always more good than bad. Always more laughter than frowns.

The Future

Site announcements (village/district) for our permanent homes for the next two years are scheduled for Wednesday.

I’m excited to share with you how my first week at the site went!